Birthdays come & Birthdays go...

...and my 31st birthday came & went this past Sunday!
Historically, my birthdays have been a much-anticipated thing with a lot of excitement surrounding the celebration. Last year was a particularly big deal to me, being my 30th and all. When Andrew & I got married, I warned him that I LOVED to be surprised on my birthdays, but due to my incurable curiosity combined with my sleuthful detective skills, he'd have a hard time ever truly pulling one over on me. To his credit, he's worked hard over my past 6 birthdays & has pulled off some sort of surprise or another for at least 4 of the 6.
This year, however, my birthday was so not a big deal to me that I hardly remembered it was happening, not to mention spending any time scheming about a surprise. Maybe being a mom has consumed so much of my mental energy that there wasn't anything left to think about birthdays. Maybe 31 doesn't seem very exciting to me, therefore giving me nothing to be excited about. Regardless of the reason - it just came & went this year without much fuss, which I was perfectly fine with. The small amount of fuss that did occur was, however, very fun indeed.

The day itself was full with a rehearsal for the Christmas program that's coming this weekend, an international leadership conference that had an afternoon seminar specifically for staff & faculty, and then church in the evening. I at least wanted the later evening to hold something other than our usual 'sit & watch reruns of Law & Order on the Hallmark channel' routine. So, we invited Janneke & Reuben to come over & help us get into the Christmas spirit. We put on the 1st Amy Grant Christmas album (a classic!), made a couple batches of Christmas cookies (peanut butter blossoms without the hershey kisses (they don't exist here) & white chocolate pretzels with the meltable white chocolate mom had sent me), and put up the tree & a few other Christmasy decorations. And since I'm a sucker for all thing Christmas, it was the perfect way to spend my birthday evening.

Andrew had said he wanted to take me out to dinner on Monday night & had arranged with Janneke & Reuben to come babysit (you can see Janneke & Ieva on the left). It was our first time away from Ieva, and man, was it fabulous! We went to a fancy restaurant in Old Town & were spoiled by the fantastic food & wonderful service. We were also really impressed by how low the prices were - until the bill came & we realized that the prices we had been looking at on the menu were actually listed in Euros, not in Litas. Ooops. Now dinner cost about 3 times what we expected & this nice little joint wasn't exactly impressing us with their prices anymore. Since it was my birthday, however, Andrew said I was worth it and we were able to laugh at our (fairly major) oversight & decided we won't be going out to dinner again for a while.

It was a gorgeous evening as we left the restaurant & I wanted to walk the 20 minutes home, but Andrew insisted we take a bus. This was a total role reversal for us, as usually, I'm the one who wants to be lazy & insists we ride home & it's my frugal husband who would rather walk than shell out the 3 measly Litas (approx. $1) it costs for the two of us to take the bus. But he kept saying he was concerned about Ieva...actually not so much Ieva, but more for Jann & Reub - what if she was crying out of control or giving them problems? I didn't share his concern, but thought it was sweet that he was such a worried daddy & jumped on the bus with him.

As we walked in the door, I saw the back of a body that didn't below to Janneke, Reuben or Ieva hurrying into the kitchen & identified the shirt as belonging to Casey. "Oh, Casey's here!" I exclaimed as I rounded the corner into the kitchen to see not only Casey, but Anna, Rebecca & Pisey all standing there with big smiles. "Happy Birthday!" they all said as I turned to my grinning husband. "Worried about Ieva??" I asked inquisitively. "Not so much" he told me. "Casey just has to leave by 8:30 & I wanted him to be a part of some of the celebrating."

My sneaky husband had done it again.

So the evening was spent feasting on the Christmas cookies made the night before & the scrumptious ooey-gooey chocolate cake that Anna made. Being the good friends that they are, they brought me some fun gifts & we ended the evening with a champagne toast. Even Ieva got in on some of the celebrating! :)

It turns out that turning 31 can be fun after all!

Ieva's 2 month birthday!

Today, Ieva is two months old! We can't believe how fast the past two months have gone & how much she has grown & developed during this short amount of time. She smiles often now and is much more interactive than she's ever been. It's much more obvious now what she likes (baths) and what she doesn't (wet diapers). She is a very happy baby, and keeps growing cuter by the day!

Thanksgiving in Lithuania

With Thanksgiving being an American holiday, it doesn't exist here in Lithuania. So today, while all of you in America were relaxing at home, watching parades & football and eating turkey, we were having a regular work day here in Klaipeda. We did, however, do something we don't ordinarily do in honor of this special holiday...after work a group of Americans went to our local McDonalds to get a taste of America with chicken sandwhiches & apple pies (the closest we could get to turkey & pumpkin pie). It's become an annual Thanksgiving tradition for a handful of us Americans serving here at LCC. I'm lovin' it!

Ieva's Adopted Grandma

Yesterday was LCC's annual staff & faculty Thanksgiving dinner/Christmas decorating event. It's done potluck style where people sign up to bring all the fixings of a traditional American thanksgiving dinner. The only thing that was missing was pumpkin pie...canned pumpkin doesn't exist here & I think no one had the time or energy to tackle making it from scratch.

Ieva got all prettied up in her first dress (given to her by our friends Janneke & Reuben), and to some degree, seemed to be the center of attention at the dinner. I think she was passed around to more people & had more photos taken of her than she's ever had! And we were thrilled that she did great with all of it - no stranger anxiety yet!

We were especially blessed when one colleague, Maxine, came up to me just as I was about to sit down to eat & told me that she had already finished her dinner & wanted to play Grandma & take Ieva so I could eat. Sounded great to me! Apparently, Maxine just found out that she's about to become a Grandma for the 2nd time, so I think she was feeling especially nostalgic. Since I was helping to coordinate the Christmas decorating process after the dinner, Maxine volunteered to keep Ieva as long as I had work to do - which ended up being all afternoon! Every time I'd check in with her, she said she was happy to feel like a Grandma again. I thnk Ieva was happy to feel like a Grandbaby again! When I finally got done, I walked into the lobby where they had been to find Maxine stretched out on a couch with Ieva stretched out on her chest - both were sound asleep! It was such a precious sight...
Later that evening when I was telling some people about Maxine being Grandma for Ieva, I got all choked up as I realized how much I wish Ieva's Grandmas were closer so she could get more "Grandma time" like she got yesterday. Seeing Ieva & Grandma Maxine made me feel like I was at home with my family nearby...a rare and precious gift.

Winter has come to the Baltics!

Yesterday the first fluffy flakes of winter came meandering down from the sky here in Klaipeda. It wasn't enough to stick, but against the clear blue sky, it was gorgeous to watch.
This morning we awoke to a thin white covering that has been slowly growing throughout the day. Tonight I stared out our dark kitchen window onto such a peaceful, snowy scene as I rocked Ieva in my arms & sang her to sleep. Looking down at my drowsy baby, combined with the view of the snow glistening in the lamp light as it floated down onto the cobblestone street below, put me at absolute peace. All was right with the world for those few precious moments.

Our winters here can be very long and very cold, but there's always something mezmerizing about the beauty of the first snow of the season. After being here last month, Ieva's grandaunt Shelley has referred to our apartment "the little house in the trees." Our kitchen window looks out over a quaint cobblestone street lined with trees on each side. Our living room windows look out the back over a park thick with chestnut trees. Our view completely changes from summer to winter as the trees lose their leaves, and both scenes are beautiful. And then when the snow comes - like it did today - we get to look out over a winter wonderland of icy white branches.
We truly are so very blessed.

Baby Transport in Europe

As we mentioned in an earlier post, we've been enjoying carrying Ieva in a sling around the house, as it keeps her happy being close to us & gives us 2 hands to do things with. Until this week, however, we hadn't ventured outside the house with her in it. Due to the somewhat complicated nature of our transportation system here, the time came to brave the elements & try it outside the safe walls of our home.

Before Ieva came into our lives, getting around our city of Klaipeda without a car was fairly easy, and we intentionally have made the decision to stay carless despite her addition to our family. The city has lots of options for public transportation - taxis, mini buses & big city buses (the photo to the left is of an older-style city bus). And not to mention the general public's modus apperandum - their feet. This is a walking culture. On any given day, the streets are full of people - leisurely strolling, heading with a purpose toward somewhere in particular, or popping in & out of the many shops that line our downtown streets. You also see loads of baby carriages - no matter what the weather!
Our pediatrician actually prescribed 2-3 hours of fresh air for Ieva & I per day! And she was quick to tell us that there's no weather too bad for babies - only for parents. Apparently, all Lithuanian parents get this same prescription & it seems that most follow it. I feel like I'm doing well if I get her out for a walk 2-3 times per week! We have a typical Lithuanian stroller for Ieva, but to most Americans, it looks like a baby-sized armored personnel carrier. They are built to be taken on cobblestone streets (off-road tires), to be out in the rain (it came with a plastic rain cover), and to be out in the bitter cold temperatures of the Baltic winters (it's made of thick material & has lots of layers to bury the baby deep within). We tell Ieva we're taking her out in her mobile home - which is what it essentially is to her, since she has no clue what is going on in the world outside her cocoon.
Since we live on the 3rd floor, keeping our big stroller up here is not ideal. It actually has a portable bassinet that sits in it, so we're able to keep the stroller locked in the basement (just 5 steps down from the front door) & then carry her down in the bassinet before loading her in. Once we're out on the streets we're all good.
Well...sort of.
One of the first days I took her out alone for a walk, I realized all too quickly how people bound to wheelchairs must have felt back in the days before the Americans with Disabilities Act in the US. European streets were not designed for wheelchairs or strollers. Not only are the cobblestones a bit rough, but most shops either have steps going up or down to get into them. It's rare to find a place where the entrance is level with the street. And no place besides the major grocery chains offer ramps. So, here we are - the moms & handicapped of Klaipeda - bound to the sidewalks. But looking on the bright side, our bank account will probably benefit because of this sad state of affairs!

When it comes to going somewhere too far to walk with a stroller, that it a whole different story. Our friends Kim & Mark live in another part of the city where it would probably take a solid 45 minutes to get to by foot. Last week my friend Gina & I were taking our girls to Kim's for a play date with her kids. Gina knew I had been curious about taking my stroller on a city bus, so we met at a nearby bus stop to take one to Kim's. We discovered, however, that not only did we only have 1 option of all the bus routes that would take us where we needed to go, but within each route, there are different shapes & styles of buses. Some have wide doors without steps that are conducive to strollers & wheelchairs while others don't. You don't know what kind of bus you'll get until it pulls up to the stop. So, we waited & the bus that could take us the right direction finally came, but alas, it was an older model that wasn't stroller-friendly. Such is the fate of a mom in Eastern Europe. Gina ended up calling her husband & sweet-talked him into giving us a lift in their car.
A few days later I was going back to Kim's again & decided to forget about the stroller & try taking Ieva out in her sling. That might sound like a relatively normal thing in the States, but I've barely seen parents carrying kids in front or back packs, not to mention something as strange as a baby sling. After bundling Ieva up inside it & then putting it over my thick coat, it actually worked great & allowed me to catch one of the many mini-buses going the direction I needed to go. Even though the bus was pretty full, I was able to manage essentially the same way I would if I had big bags of groceries. The people on the bus kept looking at me & Ieva and making little comments in Lithuanian, which I think - as far I as I could understand - were all positive about how cute she was. Either that or how crazy this foreigner must be to carry her baby around in what probably looks like a book bag!

Oh, the joys of being a foreigner with a baby in Eastern Europe!

Parental Nighttime Dementia...

I've decided that there is a new disorder I'm going to patent "PND" or Parental Nighttime Dementia. This is what we have been experiencing during the past 6 weeks since having a newborn in our lives! It's the act of doing or saying crazy things during the night due to waking up abruptly (or not waking up at all) in response to the baby.

We're generally not fans of the family bed principle, but have, at times, let Ieva sleep in bed with us - usually out of desperation to get her to go back to sleep (here again - PND can be blamed). This occasional 'baby in bed' act has caused both of us a different times to awaken abruptly in the middle of the night & start pushing the other one around, convinced they are laying on top of the baby. I've been guilty a time or two of sitting straight up & immediately trying to lift Andrew's arms & roll him over, thinking I'd find Ieva suffocating beneath him. He's done the same to me at least once where I suddenly was awakened by Andrew feeling across my chest (and not in that 'let's get it on!' kind of way, if you know what I mean) & trying to roll me over, repeatedly asking "where's the baby?"

To our (and most likely, your) relief, Ieva has never once actually been in our bed at any of the times we've searched for her, having been put safely down in her own bed earlier on each of those nights. Once we've come to, we've then quickly remembered that she isn't actually small enough to be hidden by either of us & can't roll or crawl to hide from us, either. Not to mention that anytime she actually does sleep with us, I'm never in a full state of sleep anyway, out of paranoia that one of us could actually roll over & crush her in our sleep. Before any of you start sending emails warning us of the dangers of co-sleeping, let me assure you that we have done our research, and do have a very large bed in which we are very careful when our precious daughter shares it with us.

The other recent sign of PND that was more comical than anything else came last week... Ieva's crib is currently in our room at the foot of our bed (we'll move her to her own room in another month or so), and it's easy to wake up when she wakes up or hear her when she has a problem. Unlike me, Andrew can sleep through her crying - or at least stay laying there with his eyes closed, letting her get her energy out. I'm not quite there yet. The other night we tried to let her cry herself to sleep (she was 5 weeks old at the time), and after she cried for an hour straight & I had cried for at least a quarter of that time, we got her up & I fed her and we cuddled her until she zonked out. I could barely handle it. I actually just read an article that said that biologically, moms are designed to react more emotionally to their babies cries than dads do. So...that's my excuse.

ANYWAY...back to the original story...as much as Andrew can sleep through her crying, it's when she makes the slightest weird sound or momentarily stops breathing that he'll wake up out of a dead sleep. The other night she made some strange choking sound & he was up at her cribside in a single leap! After I slowly came to, I laughed & commented about how quick he can wake up & move when he wants to (not quite the same story in the mornings), to which he responded "I'm both a father AND an athlete!" in a very stoic voice. It was hilarious - especially considering it was in the middle of the night. I asked him the next morning if he actually remembered saying it & he said he did. Well...quick wit does run in the Stave family...I guess now we know that it can even be used while waking from a dead sleep!

Fall Break is here!

The much-anticipated fall break has come to Lithuania Christian College. For many students, staff & faculty, fall break means they not only get a week off, but it also gives them an opportunity to travel. We know of students & colleagues who are spending this week in Russia, Slovakia, Austria, Spain, Germany, Latvia, the Chech Republic & many other European destinations. Since this is our first school break with a baby, we decided to make it our first break to stay at home, rather than joining the masses out seeing the sites.

It has been an unusually gorgeous fall here with the majority of October giving us crisp blue skies to brighten up the cold days. By now, Klaiepda is usually under a continual cloud of gray skies often bringing rain and sometimes, snow. We've been rejoicing each morning as we wake up to God's gift of yet another perfect fall day!

Since our pediatrician here in Klaipeda told us that we need to take the baby outside for 2-3 hours per day (yeah, right!), this weather has at least motivated us to get her out for a couple hoursevery couple of days. She usually enjoys being bundled up in the blankets in her heavy-duty stroller (which may as well be a heated car, for all she knows!), but earlier this week she didn't seem to enjoy the beauty of the blue sky & colored leaves as much as we did! At least she looked adorable in her pumpkin hat! (Isn't there some saying like "if you're going to be miserable, you may as well look great while doing it?")

Happy Halloween!

Despite Halloween not being a Lithuanian holiday, we thought taking our little leapord to the dorm for some trick or treating would be a good excuse for Ieva to see students & to wear the cute outfit a friend gave us! We went and had dinner with Jon (RD on my staff), and then took Ieva around to meet a few students. Since it's fall break this week, the dorm was pretty quiet & gave us a chance to pop in & say hello to a few students, rather than getting mobbed by the masses, as could have happened when classes were in session.

Andrew put Ieva in the sling & we wandered up & down the 5 floors knocking on doors & giving students the opportunity to oogle over Ieva! When we saw Ambrose, our student from Ghana, he commented that the sling reminded him of how African women hold their babies! Andrew has no shame about being compared to an African mama! The sling has become every member of our family's new favorite accessory, as it allows Ieva to curl up next to us while giving us two free hands to function with. Those African women knew what they were doing when they came up with the idea!

The Stave Family
October 31, 2005
Ieva - 5 weeks old